Real World: Real RhyDin Season 2--The Season That Wasn't

[JewellRavenlock]

Pre-Production: Season 2

As much as Suit #1 (still the only suit in the room) despised working with these yahoos to his very core, he had to admit that they had saved RhyDin Sports Network (RSN) last year with the first season of Real World: Real RhyDin. Now his superiors were demanding another hat trick: they wanted something bigger, something even better than Real World: Real RhyDin.

Raise the stakes. Take it to another level. More partying and fornication. More violence. More cat-fights. More Gren getting upset because no one knew how to recycle.

And Suit #1 just couldn’t deliver. Not on his own.

“Okay people, so we know what they want from us. Now how do we get it?”

“Closer confines,” Dudette #2 offered.

“Yeah,” Dudette #4 agreed. “Less space means they’re like… thrown together more. Creates more tension, you know?”

“Good,” Suit #1 said, looking to Dude #3. The young man tapped out the idea on his tablet and it appeared on the screen behind Suit #1. Technology. Meh. “What else?”

Dude #1 was still toking away, his other hand up to his wrist in a bag of chips. He stuffed them in his mouth before offering, “We should make them do stuff.”

“What kind of stuff?” Suit #1 raised an eyebrow.

“Just… stuff.”

“Like challenges?” Dudette #2 ventured.

“Yeah! Challenges. Contests. Whatever. Just different stuff.”

Suit #1 sighed before gesturing to Dude #3, who put “challenges and stuff” up on the board. “Okay, we can define what other stuff we want them to do later as well as figure out what these more closely confined living arrangements will look like. We have another problem to tackle today: it seems dear Kate will not be returning for another season.”

Dudette #4 let out a gasp, “What!? No Kate? But.. but…”

“Might be a bit dull without her making up outrageous nicknames for everyone,” Dude #3 commented. He had a “Team Sugar Snatch” shirt with Jewell’s face on it.

“Yes, that is what the board is afraid of,” Suit #1 admitted.

“Who are they getting instead?” Dudette #4 asked, trying to stave off her hysteria. She loved Kate!

Suit #1 finally smiled, “Funny you should ask…”

[JewellRavenlock]

Interview/Tryout Scene: And Then There Were Seven
October-ish 2018

The returning members of Real RhyDin were gathered in a small conference room at the RhyDin Imperial Hotel. According to their new contract with RhyDin Sports Network, they were supposed to be doing some pre-season recording for the show while they interviewed a number of potential team members for the seventh spot on the roster.

The cameras were already rolling just incase Jewell or Tahlia decided to take a swing at each other while an intern rushed around, explaining the schedule for the day. Unfortunately, nothing exciting had happened... yet. Instead, everyone was just standing around, sipping OJ or coffee and nibbling on the buffet of danishes the hotel and network had provided for them. Eden lingered behind at the buffet to package up some danishes ‘to go.’

“I don’t want to interrupt them,” Intern #2 whispered to Intern #1.

“Why the hell not?”

“They’re scary!” This was Intern #2’s first time being around the Real RhyDin team. RSN had to hire a whole new crop of them for this year, and they each had to sign a waiver that any lingering effects from being exposed to glamour was not the responsibility of the network. “That big guy,” he looked askance at Kheldar, “looks like he could crush me with one hand and the captain isn’t much better. Have you seen his thigh muscles!?”

Intern #1 rolled her eyes, cupped her hands around her mouth, and called out, “All right everyone! We’re just about ready to get started and bring in the first candidate. Please take your seats at the table.” To Intern #2’s great surprise, they listened. “You’ll notice that we have not prepared questions for you to ask your new, potential team mate but you are limited to a 10-minute window for each one. Intern #2 is going to drag out some mats,” she stared at him until he realized with a start that he was Intern #2 and rushed to go get the mats, “so if you want to test the candidate in hand-to-hand, you can. Any questions? No? Excellent. Let’s begin!”

As Intern #1 went to bring in the first person, Jewell elbowed Gren lightly. “Yeah, I have a question. What else can we test them in, huh?” She waggled her eyebrows. Gren was not the ideal person to ask this question to, but without Kate, she was missing a partner-in-crime and she certainly was not going to make a bawdy joke to Tahlia!

Gren blinked and looked at Jewell. “Environmental conservation consciousness?”

The Empress blinked right back at him and quirked a grin, “Yeah sure! I mean, why not?”

“I think spelling is very important too. We can’t have illiterates on our team.” Hope made her way over in a Real RhyDin tracksuit and plopped down in a chair with a mug of… something. “It may be more important than throwing a punch.” She grinned.

“I don’t think ‘illiterates’ is considered a nice term,” Jewell smirked as she leaned over to sniff at Hope’s mug but was sadly thwarted from her real objective (plotting to steal it if it was something better than normal coffee) when the first candidate walked in.

The “coffee” was roughly 80% not coffee, 20% coffee.

The killer stalked in, an inviting smirk painted red. The lipstick a shade lighter than the loose burgundy silk tank she wore. The black straps of a lacey undergarment hidden beneath a fitted black vinyl jacket. Wavy, dark brown hair had been brushed with maroons and purples at the frame of her face. A bottle of cotton candy vodka dangled almost precariously from her fingers, brushing against the fabric of worn and torn grey jeans. Despite the heels of her half-calf boots, her steps made no sound. Approaching the chair set before the group, she gave it swirl, turning the back of the seat to face them. A smooth movement left her straddling the seat, using the back of the chair as a resting spot for her arms. Rich brown eyes regarded the group, landing on Gren, she gave him a seductive wink.

“Uhhh okay where do we start?” Hope began ruffling through some of the papers before her. A few clauses, some n.d.a.’s, the typical stuff she refused to read, all deposited beside her on Jewell’s pile before she got to the list of names before her. “Alright why don’t we start nice and easy. If you were stranded on an island and you could choose who you were stranded with, and being saved was clearly not an option, what liquor would you bring?”

“Mm. Good question.” She swirled the cotton candy vodka in the bottle, tipping it up and drinking for several seconds. Brow lifted, answer enough?

Gren immediately turned red, then purple, then white. “I . . . uh . . . I think there is a conflict of interest with this particular . . . uh . . . candidate. I think we should move on, or uh, let’s try someone else . . . actually, can I be excused? I really don’t need to be here . . . !” Gren stood up from his chair and was trying to make a hasty getaway.

Intern #1 was extremely competent and stuck her foot out to trip up the Ranger without skipping a beat. “Who else has a question for Ms. MacLairish?”

The Empress took a turn as she reached over to snag Hope’s coffee while the captain was distracted by the fallen Gren, “How do you feel about girl code, Maul? You know, not sleeping with the same guy your teammate is sleeping with or was sleeping with unless they’re cool with it?”

Tahlia had been fairly quiet, occupied with her phone, and smoothly tucked her feet out of Gren’s path as the intern sent him sprawling. Dressed in Versace workout gear, the little blonde glanced up at Jewell’s question, and shook her head, with an almost imperceptible roll of peridot eyes.

Gren fell flat on his face with an audible “OOF”. The momentary shock was replaced by the idea that he could still find a hiding place. The loud rustling sound could be heard behind everyone’s chair as Gren frantically tried to scuttle out of sight like a crab.

Kheldar, sitting off to the side by himself as usual, idly reached up to redirect one of the lights shined on the applicant on to his fallen teammate. You know, in case he needed help seeing to get up. Shockingly no crew member objected to his interference to their job.

Maul ran her tongue over her upper lip in thought. A glance to Gren, “Mmmm… I take no issue with you going after him, but I’m under the impression that Gren is already taken. Course, if you’re asking me to try and keep track of your lovers….”

“Wait a second", Hope paused from getting up to aid Gren to looking over at Jewell. First, she slid her mug back and then sat back down. “You can’t get between Gren and true love it’s just not right! Now she does have good taste but what are the complications here? Kheldar what do you think?”

“Hmm?” the big man replied, letting the grip resume his own duties with a wink. “I mean.. I hope you’re right that it’s true love, but with forest folk you can never be sure. They’re flighty like that.” Grins and then shrugs, answering the actual question. “Mostly that this is a terrible way to figure out if someone can fight. I remember her fighting in the Outback a time or two. I’m sure she’d handle herself in the ring.” He paused, sipping his water. “But really. Cotton candy vodka?”

Gren stumbled to his feet as Hope tried to help him up. His face looked like he had broke out in hives. “Cotton candy vodka bad . . . . very bad . . . . “ He sputtered out.

“Oh, I love cotton candy!” Having lingered by the danishes, Eden whizzes by Gren on her roller skates, not exactly helping Gren recover himself. A quick hop, and she was onto the platform, wings whapping along everyone’s back until she found a seat next to Kheldar.

Tahlia’s attention snapped away from her screen long enough to glare up at whoever was smacking her - only to shake her head with a smile when she saw who it was. “Hey, sugarplum...try not to get fairy dust all over, okay?”

Jewell smirked, staying on track unlike the rest of the team--Kheldar!--and responding, “Okay. I guess we can share.” Then she slid Hope’s mug back over again and took a sip before she could be robbed.

“To be truthful... armed combat is more to my liking. Knives and all.” Her voice carried a tinge of lust when she spoke the word ‘knives.’ A light bite to her lower lip, rish browns honed in on Kheldar, “I have other tastes that might be more to your liking?” Pressing her lips together in a kiss before taking another drink from the bottle. She stopped drinking faster than before, a thought occurred to her, “Are any of you healers?” Looking over everyone but Gren, she already knew that answer.

“Meh.” Kheld moved on with that, turning his focus to Gren. “You okay buddy?” he asked as he stood to check on the ranger.

Attention moving from Kheldar to the rest, “Healing… like say… by taking the wound from the wounded and transferring it to yourself?” An odd interest lit the killer’s eyes. The blue-haired sidhe in the room remained silent, uninterested in sharing the full extent of her abilities or even a tenth of them.

Gren looked like he was trying to take deep, calming breaths. He said to Kheldar, “I’ll be alright . . . I just need a minute . . . Is it just me or is it uncomfortably hot in here?” He waved at his face with a hand as if he were getting hot flashes.

“I'm still stuck on the other tastes comment.” Hope rubbed both her temples before taking a long drink from her mug. “So… I think we just need to clear the air here. No one wants to ask but I'm sure we're all wondering the same thing: are you vegan?”

Maul looked disappointed to the response on healing. “Definitely not. I run strictly on junk food and liquor.”

“Oh thank god what a relief!” This seemed to be very important, to Hope at least.

“Seriously. I don’t know if I can survive another season of eating Kind Kreme donuts,” Jewell gagged. “It’s like they put icing on cardboard.”

The applicant’s attention left the members of the team, moving on to eye a young cameraman with deep interest.

Intern #1: The change of Ms. MacLairish’s attention did not go unnoticed by Intern #1; she followed the woman’s eyes to the cameraman that she had been eyeing! Work be damned. “Any other questions for the applicant? Nope! Okay!” She moved to the chair and quickly ushered the woman out. “We’ll be in contact.”

“Be seeing you.” Her parting remark, punctuated with a kiss to the cameraman as she’s ushered out.

“Bye!” Eden waved enthusiastically.

“Oh Thank Goodness.” Gren collapsed into his chair and looked like a tremendous weight had been lifted off of his shoulders.

[JewellRavenlock]

Looking around at her teammates, Eden beamed, “I like her!” Then she looked down at the papers on the table in front of her. “Who’s next?”

Next was John. John was possibly a great fighter, but they would never know because he was vegan.

“...and after learning that, I just couldn’t ethically eat anything other than lima beans anymore.”

“Of course you couldn’t,” Jewell responded with a pretty, fake smile all while hurriedly making the cut motion at Intern #1 before Gren could fall in love with this guy.

“You know, that was one of the most fascinating stories about Lima Beans I’ve ever heard. I never knew that Lima Beans were such a great source of molybdenum, you know that reminds me of these vitamins I used to take . . . “ Gren was indeed starstruck, then looked at Jewell in horror when she gave the “cut” sign. “No! Wait! JOHN! COME BAAAAAAACK!” Gren fell out of his chair and onto his knees, reaching out pathetically.

“Maybe we should just get him a bean bag chair and he can just stay down there.” Kheldar interjected to no one in particular as Gren ended up on the floor yet again.

“I just don't know how this fad started. There were these things, dinosaurs, some of them were vegan and guess what? None of them are here to talk about it. Coincidence?” Hope held both palms up and shrugged.

"I like him!" Eden beamed and looked around at her teammates.

“Sugarplum...you like everyone.” The little blonde certainly wasn’t going to complain about not having another voice for peace, love and ethical responsibility to the earth in the house. Tahlia liked Gren, but one of him was enough!

In entered Beatrice. She was roughly 4’ tall wearing a weathered pink and gray sweatsuit that looked to be older than anyone gathered.

“I may not know how to fight but you shouldn't be too quick to judge.” The old country was strong with this one. “With my patented diet plan, you will all give up: sugar, caffeine, alcohol, fats, nicotine and will be running fifteen miles a day! What do you say?!”

Not there and then there. Mari stood a little to the side and back from Beatrice. The little blonde wore a turquoise dinosaur costume that had her face peeking out from the mouth of the plushy looking outfit. In one hand she held a large brown bag that was spotted in grease. In the other she held a travel carrier of assorted milkshakes and malts. Her nose wrinkled at the woman in the sweatsuit.

Jewell was too busy rising in indignation and pointing at Beatrice to notice Mari just yet. “Get the hell out of here. Now!” The interns were quick to act, pulling the old lady towards the door. “Yeah that’s right, you take your sugar free, alcohol free crap and shove it up your [censored] [censored] [censored].” The faerie grumbled as she sat back down, “Heathen.”

Not that she would ever admit it, but Tahlia found herself in complete agreement with Jewell. No alcohol? Nevermind that they could pry her caffeine and nicotine out of her cold dead hands. So far, she hadn’t felt the need to ask any questions, and her eyes hadn’t strayed too far from her phone screen, except for the incident with Eden and her wings.

“She obviously is not the customer. But! I am always where I am meant to be!” Turning to the group, “Fat Chad’s Food Delivery! Who ordered the Family Burger Bonanza from Meat Meat Meat and Eat?” Holding up the shakes and the bag full of burgers, fries, and other fried goodness to the group lined up behind a table.

“Whoah!” Hope stood up and slammed her fists on the table. “That's…” she pointed at the dinosaur delivery girl and cupped her face with the other hand. “ADORABLE!” She keeled over in pain.

During the confusion of the entrance of both Beatrice and Mari, Gren had gotten to his feet and was begging one of the interns to get John back. “ . . . but I wanted to hear more about how Lima Beans prevent constipation and regulate blood sugar levels! Don’t tell me his name was just “John”, he had to have a last name! Phone Number? Forwarding Address?” Gren’s eyes shifted wildly around the room as he looked for someone who could answer his important questions.

Jewell pat his arm, “There there, Gren. It’ll be okay. Beans come and go. It’s the circle of life.”

“Well I have just been through the emotional wringer today. Seriously, is there anyway this can get any worse?” It’s then that Gren turned and saw Mari the delivery girl, causing his eyes to bug out and jaw to drop.

Spotting Gren in return, Mari's jaw dropped in return. Her look, however, was happier than Gren’s. “Sandwich! Look at you! Ugly as ever! Oh my goodness, I couldn't forget a face as terrible as yours. Just look at it!” Sometime during this slew of words that did not seem to include breaks or breathing, the delivery girl was out of the Dinosaur costume. Curiously, the costume remained in place, still holding the food as if it wasn't empty at all. Did it's tail move or was it a trick of the eyes? Mari, out of the suit, was not naked. She wore a white, blouse-like halter with a black skirt, glittering red flats, and a magician's top hat. There were even cuffs circling her wrists, though unattached to her top. The small blonde moved to squish Gren's cheeks. “So horrible! Just as I remembered!” Her eyes widened and she peered closer to him, unblinking. “Did you order the Family Burger Bonanza? To eat all alone!? Are you eating your feelings because no one will ever be able to look beyond a face like this!? Do not worry Sandwich! There is some nice, very blind, possibly without the use of her nose,” Here she wrinkled her nose again, this time as though smelling something distasteful, “and she will… well, maybe not love you. Tolerate? Slightly? A little? You're right. No one could. No wonder you are so hungry! Food is your only source of love. How tragic!” The dinosaur costume nodded it's agreement behind her.

“Sandwich has a type.” Kheldar notes again to no one in particular, definitely not letting that nickname go away any time soon.. “Maybe we could sign the Dino Suit.”

Tahlia watched it all with a wide eyed smile that was meant to be reassuring and innocent, but likely only enforced the idea that if she was wearing a halo it was held up by horns. “Oh...this is too perfect…”

Jewell smirked aside at Kheld, “Now there’s an idea. I bet the suit isn’t vegan.”

The more Mari talked the wider Eden's eyes got. She stood up. "Hey! Don't you talk to Gren like that! He has a perfectly nice face! You go away!" Then looking around at her teammates, dropping back into her seat with a huff. "I don't like her!"

“You know, I don't mean this in the wrong light Gren, but you definitely seem to know a ton of people.” Maybe there were some really interesting tree club bars that were stashed away on Mt. Yasuo. Her own jaw dropped at Eden's reaction. “I guess it's still bullying even if most don't agree with her point of view. But the dino suit…” She got up and walked over careful not to touch it, but orbiting it in awe. “I don't actually know who ordered this but we can't just leave you hanging.” She pulled out some folded bills and held them out to the dino.

Tahlia actually put down the phone, staring at Eden in shock. She didn’t think she’d ever heard Eden say she didn’t like anyone, or anything. Ever. “Guys...if Eden feels…that strongly…” Truth be told, she was more than a little distracted at the moment. A chime from her phone, and she was stepping away from the table with a sigh, and pressing the phone to her ear. “I thought dwarves were supposed to be ‘master builders’...yeah? Then why can’t you seem to get things moving without me!”

“Go away? But it's been ages since I've seen this ugly mug!” Mari squeezed Green affectionately. “Oh! I forgot!” She patted down her shirt, pulling out two sandwich bags from thin air, “I saved a sandwich for you Sandwich! Now… which one is the cursed one and which one is the one I saved for you?” Looking between the two, she ended up giving them both to him. “The cursed one won't kill you or anything. The witch told me it will just scream. For like a day? Or two? Maybe a week? I wasn't paying attention. You'll be fine!”

While Mari talked a mile a minute at Gren, another Mari popped up by the Dino suit. “Thank you for selecting Fat Chad's Food Delivery Service to serve your hunger needs!” The second Mari took the shakes and bag of food, unloading them from the Dino and handing them over to Hope.

“Uhhh, thanks.” She wasn't sure really what was actually going on anymore but with her hands full she made her way back to the table to distribute the goods. “Gren make sure to definitely, absolutely eat both sandwiches later.” She gave a few blatant winks before nudging the trash can in his direction under the table with her foot. “So what's your name and why are you delivering food?”

The second Mari opened an unseen door that the Dino Suit walk through, vanishing. The door shut behind it, Mari #2 turned to the group. “I! Am The Magnificent Mari The Magnificent!” Glitter popped in the air behind her. “Bringer of food and entertainer extraordinaire!”

Mari #1 had abandoned Gren, now setting out a small colorful business card before each member of the team. Each card the favorite color of the recipient. Each card absolutely blank.

Mari #2 continued, “For better effectiveness and efficiency I have combined The Jester’s Fun Time Services & Fat Chad’s Food Delivery cards into one! Remember The Magnificent Mari the Magnificent for your next event! That’s The Magnificent Mari The Magnificent! Not The Magnificent Mari, Mari The Magnificent, Mari Magnificent, Magnificent Mari, or MagMar. They’re all hacks. They will only ruin your event or your food. Fat Chad’s Food Delivery! Feeding your craving before you’re aware what you’re craving! 10% off for your first delivery or entertainment service! No refunds and service providers deny any responsibility for damages acquired from services provided!” Mari #2 now appeared to be the only Mari, the other vanishing after handing out the cards. “Any questions?”

“I’m with Eden,” Jewell said around a mouthful of hamburger. “Go away. We don’t like you and you talk too much.”

Mari, not at all put off or seeming to register dislike toward her, “No questions! Remember, 10% off! If you need entertainment or food just use the card! And thank you for using Fat Chad's Food Delivery for your hunger needs!” Taking off her with a tip and a bow, the girl vanished behind it. The hat lingered a moment before collapsing in on itself and vanishing as well.

Gren stood there in shock while the two Maris did their thing. Finally, when they left the room, Gren snapped out of it. “ . . . . Don’t call me ugly!” He said, with an emphatic point of one of Mari’s sandwiches. “I guess I told her.” Gren nodded to Eden and Jewell then sat down with his arms crossed, as if he just set Mari straight. Then he remembered the sandwiches he was holding and dropped them on the table as if they were live snakes.

Tahlia returned to her seat, glaring slightly at the intern who had followed her, and then herded her back to the table, yammering about the interview process and contractual obligations. Dropping her phone onto the table, she slumped in the chair, and snagged a french fry to nibble on. “What are they, the food sponsor for this year? Nothing but takeout? And I’m not wearing a dino outfit!”

The big man snaked a milkshake. “Best applicant yet. If it didn’t come with the magical babbling twins we could have all just called it a day.” Looks at the door. “I wonder who’s next in the ‘Gren this is your life’ parade.” Sips the shake. “I hope they bring nachos.”

“You know I can't help but feel like she had potential. Sure, we'd need to condition her to stop verbally and physically abusing Gren, but you never know.” She was picking at fries. “I mean I literally just paid for a meal I didn't order. That says something doesn't it?” It sure does Hope. It sure does.

Kheld shrugged in response to the captain. “Mild abuse beats Stabby McCrazyEyes or lima bean farts. Also it mostly says you forgot what Producers are for.” Grins and snags himself some fries as well after stashing the business card away for safekeeping. One never knows when they might need food, or entertainment, or Gren harassment delivered.

Tahlia had missed the speech about the cards, but it somehow stuck itself to the back of her phone anyway.

[JewellRavenlock]

Suddenly, the door burst open and a man wearing a fluorescent yellow sports jacket, a powder blue t-shirt, enormous red sunglasses, ripped-up jeans, and bright red tennis shoes runs in front of everyone.
“GOOD EVENING LADIES AND . . . Wait, I don’t see any gentlemen here! AHAHAHAHAHA! The name is ‘Laughin’ Les Snodgrass! Comedian for hire! Hey, is it HOT IN HERE? Or is it just Jewell? AHAHAHAHA! I figured Gren would appreciate a corny joke like that! Get it? A corny joke? ACORN? AHAHAHAHA!!!! So tell me folks, what is the deal with Anubis, huh? Have you heard about this? Can someone please EXPLAIN this to me? I mean, DO YOU SEE WHAT’S GOING ON HERE? I mean, fair is fair, but COME ON!”

Hope stood up and walked out. A frantic intern hurried after her.

Without notice, sound, or really any particular malice Kheldar uses the distraction of people trying to wrangle Hope to whip a ball at the new candidate.

“Oh no. No no no. I am not living in a house with that.” Abandoning the fries, Tahlia picked up her phone again, and flashed a thumbs up in Kheldar’s direction. “Reflex check, right? Not that it matters. Seriously...who’s doing the casting for this??”

“I'm going to beat his [expletive][expletive]!” Could be heard from the hall outside. “Who's running this [expletive]?! How hard is it to find even a homeless guy who can throw a punch around here?!” After a silent moment or two Hope returned inside and took her seat.

Considering Hope’s storm out, and Kheldar’s ball throwing, the powers that be decided to pull the plug on Les’ performance prematurely. As three interns were trying to hustle him out of the room, he shouted. “Thanks, you’ve been a great audience! I’ll be at the Heckle Hut, October 29 at 7! The Laugh-A-Minute on November 14 at 9! Be kind to the elderly and tip your waitress . . . . !”

Jewell was apparently the only one who enjoyed Les’ performance. She was laughing so hard she was crying and had to wipe tears from her eyes as he was dragged out, “But really? What is the deal with Anubis?”

“What?” Kheldar asked earnestly. “Testing the reflexes of someone you’re hiring for a combat position is a very reasonable thing to do.” He defended his actions to no one in particular as he retrieved his tennis ball. “He lost points for not even reacting to the bright yellow object flying at him, but credit for keeping up the shtick. I mean… hacky shtick but credit for not giving up I guess.”

Jewell wiped away the last of her tears, “For a real test, you’ve gotta throw something harder.”

“Or sharper. Preferably sharper. A barrage of daggers seems appropriate…” The phone was still in her hand, a name cued up on the screen, but the blonde hadn’t dialed. Yet.

There was a small pow-wow happening outside of the room as those dealing with the line-up went through the list of applicants, fearful that who they sent in next would make or break them. The breaking being quite literal, given Hope’s reaction. It was with great relief that they saw one of the later applicants arrive, more relief because there had been no guarantee of the applicant showing up.

Intern #2 guided the next applicant in, looking hopefully toward Hope.

Candy’s expression was not hopeful. It was irritated. Meaning, it was her usual expression. The woman did not look at the group doing the interview process. She moved to the chair as Intern #2, keeping a safe distance, guided her to sit. She sat, an arm draped over the back of the chair, the look of annoyance remained. It was anyone’s guess how someone who didn’t appear to want to be there ended up in that room. She wore the typical leather jacket, tank, jeans, and boots that she usually wore. The hair remained shorn sort, leaving the the flesh of her scalp and the mark of the scar on the back of her head exposed. Rolling her neck to crack it before she focused on the group. Candy didn’t offer any words to them.

After a long, awkward pause, Gren glanced at his fellow team members, then nervously cleared his throat. “Uh . . . . . where have you been?” He asked, bewildered.

“Not here.” Not your business.

Kheldar offered the new woman a nod in acknowledgement and as the team started their interview her, it was the big man’s turn to address the producers. “Kinda buried the lead here didn’t ya. If there’s any other former champions with multiple other dueling titles on their resume why don’t we just add them to the short list now.”

The everpresent phone was slowly set on the table. The face and form was familiar. “Tequila...right? The Inn…” Tahlia had met the woman before, and she’d clearly made an impression.

Candy's attention moved to Tahlia. There was a pause then she provided the other woman with a short dip of her head in acknowledgement. Her expression didn't change or give away any of her thoughts.

“Hmmm.” She lowered herself to get her thermal mug, causing her chair to squeak. The silence was deafening. At least they found someone who could punch. “What's the most important thing to you in competition?” Hope stared at Candy.

Candy watched Hope for an extended amount of time. Someone behind a camera coughed. The edge of her jaw ticked. A short exhale of air, Candy shifted her position to roll an arm. She leaned forward, elbows resting on her parted knees. “Gettin’ shit done?” Her voice carried a tone of disinterest towards the Q & A. Her eyes glanced to Kheldar and then back to Hope, “Look. I’m here cause I lost a bet. I got ten minutes or whenever you send me on my merry way.” She glanced for a clock, “Whichever happens first. Y’can ask your questions an’ I’ll answer, but I’m not in this to audition. I fight to fight. Simple as that.”

The Empress smirked, “You mean you’re not here to join the hottest IFL team in history? Oh, we’re also the best.”

“IFL? Huh.” Candy leaned back again, mulling that over as she hadn’t gotten a lot of details from the person that set her up to be here. Address, time, bits of information she picked up because being ushered in. “What’s the contract like?” A glance around at the cameras and then back to the group, “Assumin’ it’s a paying gig…”

“We get paid, right?” Jewell looked aside at her teammates. The Empress did not handle her own finances. After a look of confirmation from Hope she turned back to Candy with a smile. “Of course it’s paying! We’ve got all sorts of sponsors and endorsement deals too. Oh yeah, and they gave us a sweet house to live in last year with all these servants--”

“Eh . . . uh . . . I think you mean interns, Jewell . . . “ Gren helpfully corrected her.

“Right right… interns, that’s what I meant. All of these interns to do whatever we asked. Hey, you,” she gestured at Intern #2, who looked like a deer caught in headlights, “what’s the difference between an intern and a servant?”

“Uhh.. uhhh…” he stuttered and stammered. “I’m not really… you see… I don’t… as a matter of fact…”

“We get university credit for doing this,” Intern #1 explained in slight exasperation.
“Got it,” the faerie smiled and looked back to Candy once more. “You see? They get university credit for doing everything for us. It’s mutually beneficial. And we get paid.”

“Contracts vary on the fighter in question. There are a lot of moving parts such as guaranteed pay, performance bonuses, sponsorship details as well as mandatories. Like meet and greets. Fortunately for anyone who doesn't particularly enjoy those, there are particularly few details as to what constitutes the bare minimum. One could show up and simply say: I'm here because I have to be to every question.” Hope shrugged. “Someone with your reputation could draw a nice crowd, typically that means a lot of tickets. Decent guaranteed pay. Come to think of it, I think Kheldar makes the most.” She probably shouldn't be disclosing that kind of information but oh well.

“What!? How does Kheld make more than me?” Jewell asked, suddenly indignant. “I’m a [censored] household name in RhyDin.” She snapped at Intern #2, “You! I need you to rectify this situation immediately.” When he just stood there, staring at her, she made a shoo’ing motion at him. “Go… go on. Fix it.”

Intern #2 ran out the door.

“Unbelievable,” the Empress mumbled, “pay disparity in this day and age!”

“So, since last year was the team's first and all, he had the most guaranteed since he was a former champion. Eden had a rookie contract, Tahlia as well. You definitely came close in bonuses, Gren probably did well. Someone has this all on file.”

Jewell sighed, “What you really mean is that you bought me dinner and then I forgot to ask if I was making as much as Kheld. I’m sure with my assistant captain’s stipend or whatever, it comes close. But you owe me a drink Big Guy!” As if it was Kheld’s fault she hadn’t gotten paid enough.

Kheldar responded with a shrug and a grin. “Take it up with my manager slash wife.” That part wasn’t technically true, but he liked to joke about it anyway. Kheld hadn’t known, or cared that he was the highest paid, but he had been on a winning team in every major team league that had been run since he’d been fighting, so it wasn’t exactly a surprise.

“In my defense, most of my money went to charity. RhyDin Homes for Hedgehogs, The Society for the Preservation of the RhyDin Blue Dragon Beetle, and the ‘Don’t Smoke, Hug an Oak’ Program. Among others,” Gren explained.

“How many oaks did you end up hugging, Gren?” Jewell asked with a benign smile.

“No, you see, it’s a Program of my own invention. Whenever you get the urge to smoke a cigarette, you just hug a nearby tree, or recycle a plastic bottle, or do something similarly for the environment. It will take your mind off the nicotine craving. It’s . . . . still in the testing phases. But it shows great promise.” He nodded emphatically as if it was sure to be successful.

Jewell just looked confused. “I didn’t know you smoked.”

“No, I don’t smoke, I’m helping other people who . . . wait a minute, how did this conversation become about me? Aren’t we going to decide if Candy is going to join Real RhyDin? Let’s focus on the task at hand”, Gren said, trying to get the attention off of him.

As Gren spoke, Candy shifts, pulling out a pack of cigarettes and putting one to her lips. A lighter followed, an inhale and exhale of smoke. She put the pack and lighter away, “You should probably go hug a tree now.”

“So there's money involved, there's also time with the public involved. And should this year be like those previous, there will be plenty of punching too.” Two of the three sounded promising. “Also Gren that sounds like a great way to help the community.”

“Stitches seem to have healed nicely and didn’t scar too bad.” He turned his attention back to Candy. Either she wanted the gig, and was clearly the best candidate, or didn’t in which case there wasn’t a point of going through the motions so he resorted to idle small talk.

Candy nodded back. A partial smirk, “I got a good doctor.” Another drag from the cigarette. “There anythin’ else?” Scanning the group.

“Well . . . considering she’s the only real fighter from the Duel of Fists we’ve seen, I think we should have a group vote here.” Gren said, glancing between his teammates.

Hope scratched at her temple and tapped on the table they were seated at. “Alright, who’s first then?”

“Since I opened my mouth first . . . “ Gren cleared his throat. “I think we all know Candy’s record in the Outback and what she did with FireStar. Plus I can vouch for her when she was with me on the Badside Brawlers Championship Team in 2013. I think she would be a good addition to our lineup.” Gren slowly put his hand in the air, and looked around at the others.

Candy lifted a bit of a brow at Gren as he referenced her time with FireStar as a positive thing. She glanced over to Kheld then across the others.

“No issue here.”

And with that endorsement from Kheldar, the motion carried and Candy was welcomed into the Real RhyDin family.