For Nostalgia's Sake! - From Sea to Sea

[Reiko Souma]

*Note: This entire thread has been imported from a previous site, where Reiko's journal-keeping started. All of the entries recorded are based on past live-play scenes on that previous site.

Those who read this thread, there is a trigger advisory of PTSD with wartime murder - NOT graphically detailed - in a handful of posts throughout this entire thread.

07 Sept 2015: Welcome "home," soldier.

Six years. Almost nothing remains the same when you return to a place that was once considered the place to be after that long. The Shaabti War has been over for little greater than one week now, leaving the archipelago that Reiko once called home in shambles. Schian'tlo, the place her entire life was? That, along with the entire central region, managed to spare itself damage beyond the minimal level. It surprised the S.D.F. Regional Ranger that she even had a home to return to at all, much less the guardian who had helped her out after clinical insanity had completely consumed her late parents' lives. But, that scenario was completely different from the one in which the Ranger found herself now.

Thousands of people have died for the sake of maintaining the independence that the Islanders have peacefully enjoyed since its establishment so long ago. Might a note be made in interjection that the U.S. Virgin Islands wasn't even the bubblegum pink-haired woman's hometown? No sir, it wasn't. Finding that out had been another mess made and cleaned up swiftly. Camden in New Jersey was actually where Sir Reiko Souma was delivered. Schian'tlo was where she and her parents had moved for the sake of changing environments. Nice that it was to see the world at such a young age, the woman would've preferred remaining in the mainland area of the United States.

Her upper left arm would've been spared the burned-on tattoo that still hurts like the bloody hot rod that had been used, to this day. Abuse would've also been spared, but that hasn't been an issue for twenty years now. Not since her parents had their drinks poisoned with a slow-acting substance during their last night of their last vacation in Las Vegas, anyways.

Reiko doesn't like to talk about that. That's why she let her legal guardian's closest friend, a man named Kaien Hitarno, train her in swordsmanship six years after he took her in. Hearing the sounds of metal hitting metal in the heat of combat provided the thrill with the pumping of adrenaline through the woman's bloodstream. In combat situations where her military-issue bow and handmade arrows weren't an option, the Souma Katana was the weapon of choice. Reiko's commanding officer still questioned her decision to wield two weapons, but admired her nonetheless.

That sixty-seven centimetre heirloom blade has both spared and slain thousands. Who in the Hell were these H'orliak to try invading their beloved capitol city, setting up camp, and then claim it as their own? That's how wars get started. Shaabti is beloved to everybody who lives on the Islands, especially those who enlisted on their eighteenth birthday with little torches of determined pride burning brightly in their eyes. In the Shaabti Defence Force, there was no such thing as passing judgement on the outer appearance. If you could fight and were willing to die for your country and the innocents, then you were in.

Women have only been allowed to take on combat-based roles on the Islands for three years prior to Reiko's enlistment. Hence why it remained a territory to the United States. Women weren't allowed such a privilege in the mainland. When news of the Shaabti War reached Reiko's ears, the woman had been drinking heavily at the bar at the Red Dragon Inn. Her prized red berry wine had gone from full to half-empty in minutes before she then switched to whiskey. At the time, it had been the only way for her to forget about the immense pain that her first love had inflicted upon her. What had started off as a new breath of fresh air, became a very dark spiral which ended at the Arena after little more than a year. One who didn't even know Reiko had fought and killed Shade after exposing the bastard for the scum he was.

And to think, she had married that man.

Forget about concepts of love from that point on. Fighting in the war had given fresh memories whilst allowing the Ranger to unleash her built-up grief and anger upon the enemy. Hundreds of handmade Rune Arrows pierced hearts, heads, and limbs. Decapitations with the Souma Katana joined the arrow-induced deaths and injuries to bring the total body count up to the ten thousand range.

A bloody six years later, S.D.F. Regional Ranger Reiko Souma stepped off a boat at the port of Rhy'din. Correction, medically retired S.D.F. Regional Ranger Reiko Souma has stepped off a boat at the port of Rhy'din as a veteran.

Welcome back to Rhy'din, soldier.

[Reiko Souma]

One of these days, I'm gonna go home and meet Fate.

That one and the same thought always comes to me at least once each day. Understanding that everybody has their own secrets is one thing, which I suppose is why nobody's asked me why I'm no longer serving as a member of the Schian'tlo Defence Force. For the most part, this is relieving. For all I know, anyone who hears mention of my being on medically-induced retirement from the military thinks that my Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder is the underlying condition that forced me away from it. They wouldn't be completely wrong for thinking this. No sir, they wouldn't be. Why don't they try having to make a split-second decision between following their commanding officer's orders to destroy an enemy's entire village - men, women, and children included - and taking the risk of court marshal on the grounds of treason to spare the children's lives?

In the end, I ended up following orders and led my entire platoon in taking that village out...along with the next three.

For a moment, when I first stepped inside of that bar after abandoning it for so long, I forgot about my actual diagnosis which had about landed me in the hospital countless times before the conclusion of the Shaabti War. There were many new faces with a few familiar faces mingled within. Although the blue dragon has been around since before I went off, I never did learn its name beforehand. Same with the other regulars, human and not human. Whilst on this subject of humans, it should really be mentioned that I remember taking a vow to maintain the romantic solitude of a nun for the duration of my existence. My lesson was learnt after the train wreck of a marriage ended with the death of the man I had meant to divorce. The papers had been drawn up because he had felt it satisfactory to commit adultery with another.

Well, damn. You can say that vow may or may not have gone out the window...or pretty close to it, anyways. That part still needs figuring out.

Alas, the Inn appears to take on a lighter atmosphere as of late. Fights don't transpire everyday like they used to. Peaceful is what it's mostly become; here's to hoping that it stays that way. Many people are sociable now. As much as I like it, it's not exactly something that I'm used to. Friendly-looking people greet me with a nod and a smile. Did I mention that I'm not used to that either?

All of this was overwhelming to me. It was almost as if somebody took a coin and flipped it over without warning. Personalities and moods changed without warning. Oh Fate, how can I ever handle such drastic changes? From slaying the enemy and their camps to watching my own comrades eat their guns and poison their own drinks, I was about ready to become one more soldier who did the same. Almost.

Who would've ever thought that a smile and a wave from two such individuals not one, but two nights in a row, could force me to reconsider the irreversible decision that I had made and been on the verge of carrying out? When I'd sat inside of room number seventy at the end of my second night, every option was weighed in my mind. Joining those options were the images, images of those who had showed themselves friendly in at least one way or another. Even if they and I never spoke...

...just why in the Hell could I not remove their smiling faces from my mind?! Bloody Fate!

Those smiling faces had names attached to them, Mark and Billie. Siblings, I remember the older brother telling me at the bar that night. Eavesdropping isn't a favourite pastime of mine, but it's afforded me some of the knowledge that they're part of a group of travellers. To be honest, I didn't even think that nomads existed anymore. How quickly I forget, however, that I'm on the other side of the sea. Apparently, nomads are fairly common here.

To be honest, a lot of self-reflections seem to be repaving the path that should have been paved clearly from the very beginning. Rather than have a few drinks of that favoured red berry wine and allowing my tipsy self to kiss Mark's cheek in front of others, I should have been busying myself with the one goal I finally accomplished last night: finding a place to call home. With Schian'tlo no longer having the "homey" atmosphere that it used to have meant a necessary relocation, and Rhy'din has felt like the true meaning of what a home should be since I first set foot on its soil seven years ago. I am forever in Andu Krost's debt for offering me an apartment which meets my basic needs. A roof over my head, a secure enough place to sleep, and a place to eat comfortably is all I require. Everything else? That's something for me to take care of myself.

There are other things for me to take care of as well, and I can't be having thoughts of the very first person to welcome me with a smile, occupying my mind so often. All of my belongings have safely arrived from the village, and I was able to settle in quickly. My guardian has been wisely emptying out my bank accounts in increments and sending cheques over to me with certain amounts on them. All I need to do now is deposit them into a new localised account here in Rhy'din, and I'll be able to afford the house that I've always wanted to live in.

Damnit! Why can't I get him off of my mind?!

Saving me from a drugged pint of Lager and handing him a knife that my priest blessed for the sake of safety shouldn't be purposed to anything more than a friendship! Oi...I'm screwed if Rhy'din's government refuses to acknowledge my status as divorced, because this would be considered adultery in the S.D.F.

[Reiko Souma]

Trouble with a capital T. Something about the way he had looked at me had set me right off. You know the feeling that comes when someone fires off a remark that just seems to rub you the wrong way? Well, that's pretty much what happened. Okay, so placing my hand on the man's shoulder for the sake of getting his attention wasn't the best idea. Having someone do that to me wouldn't sit well with me, so why I did it at all escapes me.

Well, here I am now. Because of my ridiculously stupid actions last night, Andu had to go outside and retrieve me. I mean literally. Thank the Fates for him doing so (by now, I owe Fate my life several times over again), too. I would've either been pummelled into the porch, or my heirloom would no longer be my heirloom. I could very well be sitting in a holding cell as well. The charges against me are pretty damn serious if the S.D.F. was to find out about that.

The question really does beg with emphasis, what in the Hell was I thinking?

Easy. I wasn't.

A bit of wine and scotch were already in me when my mind thought it would be brilliant to follow that man outside. Did I mention drawing my Katana on him in the presence of a child as well? Drunk isn't what I was; tipsy, maybe. I was still in control of my actions, for the most part. Tunnel vision? Sure was, for my mind had only been focused on one thing: going after that arsehole.

My reward for this was a forceful teleport back to Gaia and a temporary lock down until I had come back to myself. This is the one night that I don't want to sleep. Every time I shut my eyes, even for a second, I see images of the innocent children that I had to carry out my orders on. Oh Fate, why couldn't they just live? They deserved much better than their demise by one who already had blood on her hands. Alone, that bent me to my knees at the realisation of my actions. I drew my weapon in the presence of a child.

It would be perfectly understandable if I was viewed as a maniac of some sorts who had escaped from the loony bin. Hell, sometimes I wonder if I should be there for a few days (weeks) myself!

So, I was to become Andu's Padawan (student), or face worse consequences. Not wanting to know what said consequences would be, I reluctantly agreed to become his Padawan. Why not? I've already been through more than enough school...but this is where I mistake myself already. This is nothing like any form of school or training that I've ever been through. You mean I get to move about my new home freely and stuff?

Not...quite. I'm under Andu's supervision whenever we're out in public. In other words, I'm a prisoner on escort, only I at least get to have some form of fun. There was a carnival coming up, I'm told. Rhy'din has one in the Docks around this time every year. I've never been to one in my life, so I really want to go. I suppose it only makes sense that I do, considering Andu is most likely going as well.

"Unarmed," is the condition that I'm given. What. The. Flip. I'm clearly not happy about this. What if there's trouble? An unprecedented attack of some sorts, someone who needs saving. Nope, Andu wasn't having it. My weapons were to be locked up if I wanted to go out. Sigh. I really want to go to this carnival, but I also want my weapons with me...at least my Katana! (Funny, the weapon I almost lost is the one weapon that I want to take with me.) "Unarmed, or not at all," was pretty much what convinced me. There was no having it both ways, or even meeting halfway. With great reluctance and - yes - a pout on my face, I agreed to handing over my Katana and my archery kit to Andu for lockup when the time came.

I hope I have a good time without my weapons...

[Reiko Souma]

Weekends are called weekends for a reason. The end of one week brings the start of the next week, but I wonder how many people realise that the beginning of a week is also an end of a week. It's just a new end whilst the conclusion of that week is the old end. As I know it, I ended up going to the opening night of Rhy'din's Citizen's Carnival at the docks. With Andu's imposed restrictions, that is.

Traveling by portal or by transport still takes some getting used to. At least the bright lights aren't so startling anymore. I just have to shut my eyes is all. Maybe I'll be able to open one eye next time. Maybe next time, I'll be ROR'ed - released on my own recognisance. Yeah...no. Not yet.

Alcohol is also a taboo, but I was told to not worry about that. When I was in Andu's company, someone named Nova was also in our company. She seems really nice. This carnival, though...there are so many things to do here. Some distance away is a giant wheel, a Ferris wheel. I've never been on one of those before...has anyone looked down, or around, from their seat once they reach the very top and seen all of Rhy'din? Maybe they can see beyond the city and look at mountains in the distance, the entire body of seas and the ocean for as far as their eyes can see, and be at eye level with some of the birds that soar the skies. What a beautiful sight that must be.

Nova wanted to play a game nearby, a dart game. It looked like a lot of fun! Although the darts weren't nearly as sharp-tipped as my arrows, I dealt with that. Paying earns you three darts, of which you have your chance of popping as many balloons as you can with said darts. Ridiculous as the prices are (they tend to be extravagant at places like this), this is a chance to do some target practise. Hell, this is the closest that I'll ever get to being armed since my sword and archery set were still locked away. Thanks, Andu.

Admittedly, I found the game too easy and walked away from it with two giant stuffed animals: a pink and black panda, and a black cat. We were about to go onto the Ferris wheel when three kittens suddenly popped out of the minotaur's pocket! According to my "teacher" (jailor), these three kittens are under the same restrictions as I am, but only because they're really young. They also have to be supervised. Just look at those little balls of fluff, their growing whiskers, and their innocent faces...yes, those cute little faces...and...oh my Fate, these things are growing on me. I'm already becoming attached to them.

Rosie is the name of one of the three little fluffers. The other two are her siblings, and all three of them wear matching shirts that read, "I'm a big sister!" Rosie appears to be the dancer of the three, having stepped onto my open hand after sniffing it and demonstrating some kind of dance. How can anybody not like cats? These ones, especially the kittens, are just too adorable to not be nice to. Really. Just look at them!

I really wish that I wasn't too tired to stay at the carnival, but it wiped me out rather quickly. Alas, the fun came to an end before it could truly begin; I had PT in the morning...that took its emotional toll on me. That much was obvious when I found myself arriving at the Inn tonight. Much thinking had led to the conclusion that something I had been hoping for, was a bust. Nobody is to blame for this; Fate simply didn't want it to come to pass. Other plans are in mind, I'm sure, but a small part of me aches.

To be honest, I'm a little bit irritated with Andu. Toby had been the one to give me the advice that I still intend to follow the next time an opportunity comes; he has my thanks for it still. It would've been nice to have a continuation of last week's conversation tonight, but "Mr. Guardian" seemed to think otherwise. Why, I dare not even question, lest my doing so prolong my eventual restoration to personal recognisance. I don't want this probation period to last any longer than it has to, thank you very much.

Some wolf-like humanoid found me on the porch with my bottle of water as well. Whoever he is, I hope I didn't offend him by walking away from him. I'm still getting used to talking creatures that aren't human...speaking of inhuman, some creature just appeared out of nowhere over by the hearth! It looks a lot like Chewbacca when he was a kid, all covered in hair. I wonder if it has any eyes, because I can't find them underneath all of that brown mass.

And what do you know, this Chewbacca-like fluff is my new pet! Once again, thanks Andu. Since it doesn't remind me of anything but that character from the movie, guess what I decided to name it? You guessed it - Chewbacca. The only difference between him and this tribble is, the character makes weird noises and eats different things. Chewbacca the tribble purrs when held, has no gender, and eats nothing but straight grains. Son of a flipping bitch, is that going to be fun! Maybe I should pay the library a visit and start reading up on tribbles, now that I've got one of my own to care for.

[Reiko Souma]

Is it a bad thing at all to dream about the kittens at the end of each day? If it is, then please slap it out of me. Otherwise, I'll probably spend the rest of my life dreaming about the day that I'm completely surrounded by the little fluffers. Black, white, orange, brown, chocolate, vanilla...

...wait a minute. I've also been eating a lot of pastries lately.

Sorry, Andu. Sometimes, these PT sessions really do drive me to stuff my face with all the pastries that I can fill myself with. I've had to stop drinking, wine included. Now I have to keep finding alternatives to my main beverage of choice.

Fortunately, I'm allowed to carry a small dagger that I recently bought. What's the best use for it so far? A wood-carving knife. Carving my name into a wooden cup with a calligraphic style is the best use for it at the moment. Six years of carving up enemies, and I'm now carving up wood.

What in Fate's name is happening to me?

[Reiko Souma]

It would be an outright lie for me to say that physical training isn't kicking my bloody arse. That just might be literal, this time.

Come now, don't think I'm not hearing you out there. "Craycray?" Drawing a weapon doesn't make one crazy. Drawing a weapon in a public establishment doesn't make one crazy either. Worse things have happened. Besides, I only wanted to shut the cube up. I'm not the one who started to talk to a talking cube. Who's the crazy bitch now?

Said "crazy bitch" gave me a box of clothes...and jewellry. Okay. I'll wear that black jacket. It's the closest thing to my typical attire that I'll get as far as civvies are concerned. The rest? They would take some (a lot of) getting used to. I wear my dog tags. That's my jewellry. I wear a cuff around my upper left arm. That's my accessory. I carry dark sunglasses and will sometimes wear a hat. That's my style.

Andu's decided to amp up the physical training. He's waking me up earlier and adding more to the exercises. It's making me want to look forward to various forms of therapy more and more...whatever forms those come in, anyways. Whenever the Katz come around, I feel better. Rosie, Mayflower, and Wander seem to really like me. Not only do they come up to me and let me pet them, they turn me into their human tree and climb me without reserve, making a bed out of the top of my head. Fun, right?

Kittens and Stars End Bar. Now there was something to talk about at night. Whenever Toby's at the bar, I drop everything and run. Why? Well, he does give good advice. He also appears to have a soft side to his personality; maybe his being married and a father has something to do with that. He's certainly likable. He listens, not that Andu doesn't. Toby's way with words just rings to something.

Why do I only see Mark when I'm in a foul mood lately? Nice to see you too, man! It's only been a month is all...let me drink those snakebites with you, sure. What a great time. I'm feeling all good and tipsy, just flipping dandy. So, my drunken self wanted to kiss you. Again. What the Hell did you put in our drinks? Sober me would never think to just steal a kiss to your cheek like last night.

Now I'm freaking hungover at Toby's bar...

...somebody please save me.

[Reiko Souma]

"Day ###. Mood: Why am I awake? Dear diary..."

Sleep has begun to elude me again. Not that it hasn't eluded me in the past. It's worse than the last time I had a spell of insomnia that robbed me of the actual amount of sleep that I need for function. It's comparable to that of being back in the barracks again. You slept with a gun in your hand, and your finger was curled around that trigger in readiness to fire in defence. No pity was given to the fool who dared attempt to wake you from a deceptively sound sleep. If you weren't supposed to be awake, and a fool came into your barracks to wake you up, then the chances of them dying a fool were up there.

Which is why I miss having my weapons, even the little dagger I bought a couple of weeks ago. All of them remain locked up for me to only look at whenever I'm not cleaning them, especially my Katana. I may love my archery set; Hell, I made those arrows myself! But, my Katana is my baby. My baby has years of blood on it that I'm still trying to clean off to this day. Make it shine to the point of a blinding glisten whenever anyone sees their reflection on the blade like a mirror.

I can still never forgive myself for losing control not once, but twice now. Both times, Bitch was present. Other than my lousy timing and me not cutting myself off on drinks, what should that tell anyone? I don't hate her, per se...but I definitely don't like her. Something about how she carries herself just pisses me off to no end. Andu? I don't hate him either. I just call him my "jailour" because he chose to take me in and get stuck with me, putting me through physical training. If I didn't call him that, then something might be wrong with me, but I definitely don't hate him. Me turning him into my Minotaur pillow on some nights should speak for a basic level of trust that I have for him, after all. If I didn't trust him to not kill me in my sleep, then I wouldn't trust myself with falling asleep near him at the Inn.

Then there's the Stars End Bar...something that I did mention in my previous entry as something to talk about at night. Bloody Hell, anybody who starts playing a piano is guaranteed to cut right to the core of my heart and put me on my knees with tears. That was tested and proved last night. Toby can play a mean piano, that's for sure! A bartender with talent is what he is. He gets more credit than he probably gets from his customers...except for his family and closest friends, of course. One thing's for sure: I may not be able to show my face to that man (what was his name?)* for a long, long time. He definitely saw me crying when he placed those napkins next to my bottled water. I never did thank him for that, by the way.

I want to go to another one of those carnivals. But, they don't seem to have one every weekend. If Rhy'din had a carnival at least once a month, or every two or three months even, then I would be there. That ferris wheel looks really nice; I never did have the chance of riding one at the Rhy'din Citizens Carnival a couple of months ago. How disappointing. The closest I got to having fun was easily winning two giant stuffed animals and eating that overly-sweet cocaine on a stick - I mean, cotton candy. Yeah, I meant that.

Take me to another carnival, and I'll act like a little kid on my birthday again.

[Reiko Souma]

Word has it that my guardian is searching for me. Only one word comes to my mind:

F___!

He must've found out that I have no intention of leaving Rhy'din again, and of my trouble with a few locals, or else he wouldn't have sent me a sign that he himself was coming to Rhy'din.

In other words, he's going to find me, make sure my vitals are still good, likely lecture me on my drinking. He knows that's the only reason I'd get myself into trouble is if I was drinking (again).

This is where I start saying my Fate Lines, Our Fatelands of Salvation, every prayer that my priest has ever taught me! Pray to Fate for dear life that Shourim doesn't decide to do more than half-kill me!

Yes, I am most assuredly doomed when he announces a search for me. Why? Because that means he's pissed...

[Reiko Souma]

Drained...

...as I pen these words, I lay in my bed. Pausing after every few thoughts or so to shut my eyes for a spell is beginning to become frequent in less time. Rest invades me, and I feel as if I could sleep for an eternity. Then I wake with the feeling of rejuvenation for a few moments before the feeling of being drained returns.

This first started yesterday at the Teas'n Tomes. Originally thinking that it was only me staying up too late, I took to laying aside the skeleton puppet project for the day and remained in bed. Sure, I don't particularly enjoy being given the order to bed rest. Who does, really? I'll protest to attempt prolonging it for as long as I can before I can protest no longer. By then, the feeling of the lack of energy has come to visit. Talk about an unexpected and unwanted visitor.

Andu has requested that Gaia monitor my vitals. Since that doesn't require having somebody physically present to do so, I have no issue with this. I think that request was made two or three days ago, maybe. Hey, this means I don't have to do much in the way of talking or facing people I don't know. Or like. I'm not about to get into detail on the latter any...let's just say that I stay away from them. I remove myself from their presence.

Quieter and, dare I say it, nicer? I can almost hear it now from some people: "She should get sick more often."

This is all I can write for now, for I can feel sleep threatening to overtake me yet again. I fear I might not have the energy to venture outside at all today. Andu has my apologies that I haven't been able enough to complete physical training in three days; Toby has my apologies that he might have to come to me for therapy if I haven't the energy to teleport to the coordinates that I'm to meet him at, with or without his daughters.

Reminder to listen to some more music for meditation purposes upon wake from this spell of slumber, should these thoughts to those innocent children on the war casualty list resume yet again.

[Reiko Souma]

Yesterday, I was able to get out of bed and do some jogging for some time. Shourim wants to visit tomorrow since he missed his opportunity to speak in length with Andu about my health. Or was it Toby? At the moment, I slack.

It was Toby he wanted, and still wants to, speak with. Damnit. Father had might as well admit to carrying around an obsession with the friendly bartender.

That'll happen. (Not.)

After jogging around and getting out more often, it was determined that I'm once again fit to resume physical training with Andu. Is it weird that I find myself missing this? It's because it was something to do. Now that physical training has picked up again, a diet adjustment has also been made. That means eating more meat and including more iron and protein with each meal. Father believes that, within a few months, he may be able to begin a slight reduction of my regular iron pill dosage.

He didn't have to slap me across my face, though, that bastard! What in Fate?! It wasn't hard enough, for I don't see any red marks on my face where I was slapped. There may have been witnesses...no, there were witnesses. Father had slapped me because I had expressed my disagreement with him.

Rewind to earlier in the day. Earlier yesterday, I stepped inside of a salon that I had passed by multiple times during my jogs. Strange that it might be, I was just in that mood where I decided it was time to change something about my looks. Of that ended up being my hair; several centimetres were cut off, bubblegum pink hair layered. Having hair cut from halfway down my hips to my waist feels weird, almost naked.

Once I'm used to having my hair this short, another trip will be made to that salon. People sometimes dye their hair, right? I see nothing wrong with having the bottom tips of my hair dyed black. My parents had black hair, after all...

...now...about what lies beneath the cuff on the upper left arm...that is one vicious demon that's truly going to be more difficult to overcome than any other. Even more difficult than that of those poor children I had obeyed the orders to eliminate like the lifeless targets that my commanding officer had perceived them as.

How am I not having more nightmares than this?

[Reiko Souma]

They say that the holiday season usually does something to people. Whether it's a new leaf being turned over or a blessing, Fate only knows what happens to each person. This apparently includes love being in the air as well. All I have to do is look around the Inn. It seems that, just about every other day, people are hooking up or - dare I say it? - falling in love. Something like that.

As it was, Shourim happens to be back in Rhy'din for a leisurely visit. Come on...he doesn't usually come back just to try one of the local ales! I'm waiting for Father's punchline. That line that states why he's really here. If it really is just for a leisurely visit, then I'll be at a loss for once.

Speaking of losses, I thought I about lost my dinner when the Nexus grabbed me. Father was already gone by then, and good thing. Until last night, that damned thing had left me alone for a good six years. So much for that. Father was already gone by then, and good thing. When I was dumped back down inside of the Inn, I somehow found myself laying on my side...behind the bar. My head was using the shelf as a very uncomfortable pillow, and my legs had about been contorted about like a pretzel. Ow. Seriously...ow.

Prior to that, two cats had just caught my attention. Now I know why. At least one of them, the black and white one that looks like he has a tuxedo on, can apparently become a human! I'm not sure if I'm supposed to know of said ability, but the human that joined Manami in helping me up from the floor happens to be very handsome. How charming he is, at that, and froward enough to pull me into his lap! A very silent prayer had to be said to Fate in my mind that someone would inform me of this being a dream; however, mutual unspoken responses from both of us indicated that this in fact was not a dream. A head-butt from the cat that I now know as Moneypenny helped with that.

These character references...I hope I'm not attempting a break into some unknown dimension here. But, Moneypenny and Bond are too familiar for names that I could never forget, right down to the strong British accents.

Where was I going with this entry today, Fate? Please remind me - oh, right. Non-combat skill for the week, and what am I doing? Making sandwiches. I hope Andu, or whoever was still awake at the time of my leaving for the night, likes salami and provolone cheese as much as I do. Maybe I'll start volunteering my time behind the bar again sometime, and I'll make a whole bunch of cold sandwiches for the patrons. If they like some sandwiches, then they'll get some sandwiches, because I've been through with feeding my alcoholism for a month now! (Even though I oh so badly wanted to steal a few sips of the pale ale that Father was drinking...sigh.)

Damnit. Now I really want some ale. I'm supposed to be a good woman now though, which means I'm supposed to drink something non-alcoholic whenever these urges come on. Water is for the weak urges, and blueberry-pomegranate juice is for the particularly strong urges. It's looking like a blueberry-pomegranate juice kind of morning before I get whipped through more physical training. Wonderful.

And, this is where I get off of my arse and get going.

[Reiko Souma]

Dear Fate,

My mind doth wander to places unknown as of late. Whenever one thing is supposed to be done, another crosses the front of my mind as a dancing baboon and sends me astray. Enough sleep or not, everyday has sent me into a daze. This has transpired for the last few days. Why?

Perhaps I'm about to answer my question. However, another one now comes to mind that has nothing to do with this daze. Eyes and ears, dear Fate, eyes and ears. I sat on the porch swing with company at this time. What point does spreading literal eyes and ears from whoever, or whatever, serve? My task had been to guard Mayflower inside the Inn, so I hid her behind the bar with me in the event of somebody trying to come in for an attack. Had Gaia not allowed me to use my weapons during this time last night, I would have been royally screwed.

Sitting my kit next to me provided comfort in knowing that I would not be defenceless in guarding this little one. Thank you, Fate, for looking upon me with favour last night. I wouldn't have known what else to use as a weapon, and poor Mayflower was petrified. The poor Kitton...I didn't know what else to do, what to say. Comforting others isn't my strong point. Killing others is, and I wanted to be out there...but who would have guarded Mayflower otherwise?

Before I was sent inside, there was a cloaked figure spreading these things around. Surveillance or bomb devices, I wouldn't know. Fate, my Divine, is there going to be another war? Will I take up arms once more and shed my new skin?

I shouldn't think like this, Fate, my Divine...but I do. I like this new life that I'm adjusting to, and I don't want to abandon it. There is a wonderful group with whom I consider a family, those I am now protective of. To lose a single one of them in any way, I don't want to think about the aftermath.

Please protect them better than I'm able to, Divine Fate.

Amen.

[Reiko Souma]

What is purpose? What is life?

Deserving neither and having both felt rather...dangerous at first. Some things just didn't belong at first.

The old me believed that at one point.

Emerging from underneath layers of hardened skin is a being that has an identity. There is a place for this identified being in this multiverse, and it's right here in Rhy'din. Not a single dream of returning to my native planet of Terra has interrupted my slumber since my temporary departure back home for more intensive training just about two weeks ago. Coming face-to-face with realities that I was formerly unprepared for was something of a fierce effort.

I'm not a soldier anymore.
I'm not a Terran resident anymore.
I'm not always going to be compensated by the S.D.F. either.

I've not had to report my earnings from my two part-time jobs to the Force yet. Are they waiting? Nothing has been said of it yet; they must surely know by now that I'm making candles and taking to the local bars for payment up to twice a week. Sheesh. That's not all I'm doing with my life.

Tux and Mayflower have been so nice to invite me over to their house (Kitton Base?) for Thanksgiving. They really are too kind...many here in Rhy'din are too kind and generous. A bloody meltdown at the bar triggered because I never had a family to enjoy the holidays with. How could I not accept their invitation?

Dear Fate, please don't allow me to make a fool of myself on the Thanksgiving holiday. I'll be dining with somebody else's family, albeit a family of cats, and I haven't a blessed clue of what to do. Whatever I should know, please open me up to so as not to make myself a fool. If I should bring some sort of gift to the hosting family as a token of my gratitude, then please let it be appropriate for the coming occasion.

An "adoptive" father was mentioned just prior to my falling asleep last night. I must have really needed that sleep, to have fallen asleep in the chair like that without moving another muscle afterwards. Shourim was the first to take me in and adopt me, although he is unable to return to Rhy'din. His patients need him there. He also can't keep on chasing me around for an appointment that I clearly don't always have a need for.

I sigh with a hoping prayer that I won't turn on the tear factory at the Katz home.

So. Dinner dish or dessert?

[Reiko Souma]

My salutations to you:

(Reiko draws a single line through the first line and continues writing.)

I've never been any good at writing letters to anybody, even during my childhood. Sitting down now to try composing this letter is leading to a giant blank. A question mark occupies my mind in place of words. Oh joy. So, here I am adding to my personal journal instead. I guess I went really overboard with the Bacardi. Gee, I hope I can get something down with this hangover I'm nursing.

(Shutting her journal, the woman now neatly removes a clean sheet of paper from her notebook and tries again at composing a letter. It takes three tries, but at last she finds the motivation to get going.)

Dear Bond;

Days are getting shorter, the nights longer. Meanwhile, a constant is maintained in that my happiness of late is without question. Beneath the surface is a heart that beats like most others in existence. That is no different from any other day. The reason for it is.

I have only been a permanent resident of Rhy'din for three months, and I have met many whom I can gladly call family: brothers, sisters, nieces and nephews, friends from different walks of life. I couldn't be more thankful for all of you. Each of you bring a smile to my face in your own way; whilst this doesn't fill the hole that lingers with the simultaneous deaths of my parents, it doesn't cause my gratefulness to waver any.

At the risk of further beating around the bush for this letter's purpose, I won't prolong any further. You are a great joy to be around; my heart flutters like a butterfly whenever we meet. I'm honoured and humbled to be observing my first Thanksgiving holiday with you and the rest of the Katz family.

From this point forward, I want to know you better. If I appear to shy away or move too froward, then it isn't intentional. I want to know you more and hope that the feeling is mutual on at least some scale. I care about you in more ways than one.

Sincerely,
[Reiko A. Souma's signature]

(As of now, the letter sits in a sealed envelope. A brown turkey-shaped seal covers the bottom flap of the envelope. It hasn't been delivered yet because Reiko doesn't know of the right timing or the place for it because she doesn't want to rush things. Perhaps when it's closer to Christmas, she'll do this. Until then, the letter remains in a location that she considers secret.)

[Reiko Souma]

Oh Fate, today is the first time all week that I've felt so happy. Whatever I've done for this to happen, I thank you. I can truly feel you smiling down upon me for my efforts of late.

I had Gaia help me print up the pictures that were taken last night. Seeing the last one being turned into a statue somehow...ah, how did Toby explain it during our lesson? I swear, I was paying attention. It was kind of hard not to after he blew me away with the demonstration that led to said explanation. My mind is still processing all of that, by the way. Some of it has started to make sense at last. Being stone-cold sober does help with that in more ways than one.

"Magic is technology that cannot be explained." I'm starting to really understand the meaning behind these words.

I've also been meditating with that leaf that Toby gave to me. He had tasked me with spending an hour in deep meditation with this leaf. That is, do that each day...or whenever I can. Funny how the demonstration is revisited each time. Is it supposed to be significant of something?

(Reiko pauses in her writing to meditate. She always meditates at the same time each morning, at 08:00 sharp. During this hour-long session, the leaf gives a quick twitch. However, it goes largely unnoticed by the meditator. A second twitch follows after a few minutes, only this time it looks like the woman is trying to concentrate. Finally, the leaf flips over and faces the opposite direction. Upon completing her hour-long meditation, Reiko doesn't give attention to the changed position of the leaf. It should be noted that there are no windows or doors open. Chewbacca, her pet Tribble, is fast asleep on Reiko's neatly-made bed. He usually sleeps through her meditations.)

I'm going to make a frame that holds all of the pictures that were taken last night. Painting it shouldn't be that hard to do...but there are those snowflakes as well.

But first...before I forget...whose idea was it to draw a freaking mask on my face?! Those Sharpies weren't for drawing this time! They were used at the store I'd bought my dress at...ugh. Andu. Only he would be brave enough to actually draw this Gothic-looking clown mask on my face. Now I look like a rock guitarist clown...this is going to take awhile to wash off! Thanks a lot, Andu! I hope you're satisfied with your exacted revenge now!

I had to get that out of the way...I'll wash it off once I'm done writing. Then I'll add to the pile of wooden snowflakes that I promised the Governor I would make for the orphans. That he personally likes the idea is something that tends to stick around for a very, very long time. When one comes from a land such as Terra, the politics tend to be divided from the rest of the people with this really thick wall of sorts. The governor of New Jersey certainly couldn't bother himself with walking amongst us unless there's a lot of money tied to that walk, whether it be the person or the occasion. The Council of St. Thomas and the President? Ha! They're still licking their wounds since the war ended in our victory! They owe the people a lot of money...and new homes, too.

Many people in Rhy'din would not want to live on Terra. Even with the truly anarchistic ways of West End that I heard a somewhat full discourse on from Governor and the others last week, nothing could possibly compare to the basic structure of Terra. There are laws in place there. Here, I have yet to come across any actual law or system of checks and balances. That is for better and for worse...more reading must be done...next year. Picking up a book still isn't one of my favourite things to do.

I see blocks of wood, my brand-new wood-carving set, and supplies calling me...

(Upon end, Reiko makes a beeline for the bathroom to fully survey the damage done to her face. It is this second full look that she curses having such white skin, for she really does look like a member of the rock band K.I.S.S. After taking a picture of this look with her phone for future reference, the long, gruelling process of getting rid of the Sharpie art from her face begins. One hour, several scrubs, and two blackened face cloths later, the overwhelming amount of black is finally off of Reiko's face. Lesson learnt?)